Last time I had stitches was a few years ago. I had an operation. I had stitches in my leg, belly, chest and head.
Last time I drank tequila, I slam my car. That night still is one gigantic blurry moment.
My last time was a week ago. My girlfriend was visiting.
Last time I was in a fight was 15 years ago.
Last time I got robbed, there was 6 shit heads in three motorcycles. They took my Blackberry.
Last time I cut my hair was 5 months ago. Now it’s falling off.
Last time I had Taco Bell was a disaster, 4 bean burritos against me. The burritos won.
Last time I went to a wedding I took the wedding cake home. I mean the whole cake.
Last time I drove a Ferrari, I woke up in my bed. It was all a dream.
Last time I won something was one of the best days ever. I won a car. That was 8 years ago. Since that day, I haven’t won anything.